By Boris Mellor
March 2 2009
Remember the nose tappers used to say Arsenal lacked plan a B? George Graham was particularly fond of saying it, I suspect he still does except we don't hear much of him these days. George was great at Plan B, it won us our biggest, and second European pot. Indeed we only started winning so many pots when we could no longer contest the league.
Well if plan B was winning matches one nil then Wenger is halfway there. I tried to get the boys at the Bank to sing nil nil to the Arsenal to the tune of one nil to the Arsenal, but most of the miserable bastards wouldn't join in.
Rather than booing the team a good round of this new song would cheer everyone up, and would in a satirical, but non malicious way get our disappointment over to Wenger and co. We could then polish it off with "drawing drawing Arsenal". Booing does not encourage the team and destroys fragile confidence.
Whoops I am digressing; well anything is better than previewing Arsenal games these days, but back to the main issue. Ah yes Plan A - well Wenger is already playing a sort of incompetent Plan B, nobody can beat us, 15 unbeaten games in a row (all competitions), it's just that we can't beat them either.
It's a sort of Plan C (where C equals Crab)I suppose, but surely we don't want to go back to plan B, that would be a retrograde step, unless you believe in stages theory, start off with 1-0, and then over next few weeks build up to a 2-1, then a 3-2, and finally a 4-0. I would prefer permanent revolution and make a big leap to 3-0 straight off. The only way that will happen is if Wenger returns to Plan A.
Plan A is best, lets dispense with the Year of the Crab - sideways, scuttle, sideways, scuttle, back, forward, forward, sideways. Let's go back to the good old days. Opposition takes a corner, head it down or kick it out, midfielder picks it up takes off like rocket. Two forwards sprint like hares out of traps, midfielder passes, forward in last third passes to striker who scores. Nil to one nil in 30 seconds - ah the beauty of Plan A. Once you have fallen in love with Plan A no other Plan will do. I used to love it when the opposition got a corner, it meant a breakaway goal, now it just means anxiety.
No Mystery Mr Wenger
Wenger says he puzzled why Arsenal never score, well he is the only one, ask the crowd they can tell you. It's the crab football Arsene it doesn't work. Just return to Plan A and the team will start scoring. That's why they are booing, they want Plan A back, they are bored to the back teeth with Plan C.
Wenger says he was surprised by Fulham - why? They drew at Chelsea and Liverpool. Anyhow, looking ahead to WBA, they have conceded more goals at home than any other team bar Hull. They play pretty tippy tappy football, what possible surprise could they have in store - surely not Plan A. Come on let's get in first and have a goal fest you old misers you.
Jay Simpson is loan tied and will not play, Gallas is injured.
Possible Squad: Almunia, Sagna, Toure, Djourou, Clichy, Arshavin, Denilson, Diaby, Nasri, Van Persie, Vela, Fabianski, Ramsey, Song, Gibbs, Eboue, Bendtner, Merida.
