Chelsea
Another Chelsea Debacle
Falcao Scores!
By Gary Watton
August 31 2015
The Chelsea faithful at West Bromwich Albion the previous Sunday were cheerfully reciting the old favourite, "Chelsea are back", but the bold declaration proved to be somewhat premature, if Saturday's fiasco at home to Crystal Palace is anything to judge by. Alan Pardew clearly has the Indian sign on Jose, and one wonders why the silly Geordies chose to evict him from their tenements. Even a ManUre follower on talk radio suggested that ManUre should oust the ludicrous LVG in favour of the shrewd Pardew. I am inclined to agree.
Palace took a leaf out of our controversial manual with a combination of stout defending and lethal counter-attacking. Mind you, such is the parlous state of Chelsea's defending at present that any attack launched at our quarters looks lethal. If Courtois thought that he was in for an easy ride in west London, he has had to think again. His defenders are providing him with more shot-saving practice than was deemed likely, and worst of all the Belgian is growing alarmingly accustomed to bending down and retrieving the ball from the back of the net. Was this in his job description? Can we not cope without the umbilical cord that is John Terry?
Okay, let us look briefly at the handful of positives, to offset the multitude of negatives. It is good to see Radamel Falcao open his Chelsea goals account, even before the end of August. He has taken much less time to score for Chelsea than Senor Torres. Furthermore, he has had to feed off limited game time and even scarcer scoring opportunities, so bravo to him. Furthermore, the desperate introduction of the youngsters Kenedy and Loftus-Cheek was a welcome shot in the arm, especially when the senior pros were looking so jaded and clueless. Kenedy looks a hot prospect, while Ruben's replacement of Matic was evidence of a manager exasperated by the big midfield general failing to pull his weight sufficiently. Admittedly, Matic was not our worst player. In the hall of shame lurks the following numpties:
Willian is such a busy player and the crowd have rightly warmed to his workrate. On Saturday even he was busy doing nothing. Fabregas is disturbingly looking like a one-season wonder. Hazard has gone completely into his shell. Then there is dear old Ivanovic. This guy is a legend. He would shed blood for the club, but even Father Time catches up eventually with legends. Ivanovic needs to be reshuffled to his original position of centre half, or else he needs to sit out more matches and allow Azpilicueta to regain his old right flank stamping ground, enabling new recruit Rahman to strut his stuff down the left channel. Ivanovic at the moment is a glaring liability, and every manager, player, and supporter has noticed! Small wonder that most attacks are being executed all too successfully in his sector of the field.
Incidentally, while the experts are queuing up to pour scorn on Chelsea's obvious defensive shambles, I am equally concerned that it took 75 frustrating minutes to break the excellent resistance of Pardew's troops. In spite of the dual danger of Hazard and Pedro, the champions still seemed clueless at penetrating the away team's defence. Chelsea clearly have problems all over the pitch, including midfield. The missing pieces to our jigsaw may be assembled in the next few weeks or else the west Londoners could be doomed to a repeat of the AVB-Di Matteo season when we struggled and failed to finish in the top four, only to be bailed out by a domestic cup triumph and European glory. Happily, the big-spending duo of Liverpoo and ManUre, as well as the hyped Arsenic, are all proving to be equally inept, so all is not lost, but Manchester Mercenaries have evidently swapped places with Chelsea as the runaway train already halfway to its successful destination in a one-team league, while the Blues are doing their very best impersonation of a beached whale. Improvement needs to happen and fast, because four points from four outings is relegation 'form', and we don't want to let the Muppets of Arsenil, ManUre, and Liverfools off the hook, with their own stuttering start to the campaign.
Here's hoping that September will blow away the cobwebs of August, but I won't be holding my breath. We've got the small matter of an away trip to Badison Park in mid-September where that Chelsea fanatic Roberto Martinez will be welcoming his favourite club into the bosom of his arms. Suddenly the Evercrap-Chelsea skirmish is taking on a wholly unnecessary bitterness, courtesy of Roberto's apparent detestation of CFC, a club that has the bloody cheek to enquire about one of his players. Blimey, have those west Londoners no shame? Wouldn't it be nice if Stones got sent off or scored an own goal? Unfortunately, judging by the recent failings of the Chelsea rearguard, it is more likely that the slapstick comedy will be provided by our own hapless defence. Jose Mourinho needs to remind us why he is so cosmic and transform his misfiring team. Funnily enough, back in September 2007, JM walked the plank, "by mutual agreement" after a start to the season that was considerably better than the current one! Will history repeat itself? Surely Roman and Jose have tired of instability and each craves continuity. Mourinho needs to sail through the storm. Second place is definitely up for grabs in England, because the three prominent red teams are at least as bad as us. If we can get our act together, we can push Manchester Mercenaries, in a role reversal of last season. It's going to be nothing, if not an interesting campaign.
CHELSEA 1 Crystal Palace 2; half time: 0-0.
Chelsea scorer: Falcao.
CHELSEA team: Courtois; Ivanovic; Azpilicueta; Zouma; Cahill; Matic; Fabregas; Pedro; Costa; Hazard; Willian. Used substitutes: Falcao; Kenedy; Loftus-Cheek.
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31/08/2015 04:18
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