Newcastle Defender to join 1860 Munich

After arriving at St James' Park in July 1996 for FIFTEEN MILLION (A record transfer fee at the time), Newcastle United skipper Alan Shearer admits to being jealous of his young teammates who have a whole career ahead of them.

The 32-year-old has enjoyed yet another superb season at St James' Park, topping the club's scoring charts with 25 goals.

Shearer said: "It's great having the young lads around, but it is also important to have experienced players like me and Gary Speed because otherwise, we'd be a very young side and that can bring problems.

"I have done okay this season and I am still enjoying my football in a good team and scoring goals, which is my job. But it has been a long and difficult season and at times, it has been trying.

"I am jealous of the young lads here because there is not a better place to be if you are 19 or 20 in this side and gaining experience.

"I expect to play all the games next season. I am confident I can do the same again. If I get off to a good start with goals, that will help everyone get going.

"I still have a year left on my contract and I hope after next season, I will be here another year. The way next year goes will determine that."

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Shearer Joke

Ronaldo, Figo and Shearer are standing before God at the throne of Heaven.

God looks at them and says:

"Before granting you a place at my side I must first ask you what you believe in".

Addressing Ronaldo first he asks:

"What do you believe?".

Ronaldo looks God in the eye and states passionately "I believe football to be the food of life. Nothing else brings such unbridled joy to so many people from the slums of Rio to the palaces of Madrid"

God looks up and offers Ronaldo the seat to his left.

He then turns to Figo and asks: "What do you believe in?"

Figo stands tall and proud "I believe courage honour and passion are the fundamentals to life and I've spent my whole playing career providing a living embodiment of these traits"

God moved by the passion of the speech offers Figo the seat to his right.

Finally, he turns to Alan Shearer "And you Big Al, what do you believe?"

"I believe.." says Shearer,

"..you're sitting in my seat".

THANKS TO Dappa FOR THE JOKE!

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