By Dave Eadevic
August 19 2010

Learning the way of the magpie begins young in life. My parents dropped me off outside Newcastle breweries when I was young and joint less, to follow the path of the broon and release the inner dog. My first teacher was bald as a coot, but he had trained a fine homing wig which I had to walk up and down the length of St James on a daily basis.

While meditating upon the holy place a passing priest alerted my attention by uttering language I would not have thought to hear off a man of the cloth, it was Polish I believe.

He began moving in a mysterious way (which is fair enough I suppose), and uttered a curse that Newcastle would win nothing as long as he had breath in his body.

Thinking all this a bit harsh, and being suddenly attacked by a dreadful thirst, I called for the wig and we headed back to the safety of the trapist brewery.

Time past as year faded into year, and that priest rose to become pope. I occasionally used to ponder his curse, during 3^rd lesson on a Friday, which happened to be double pondering, and began to fear as each season past without reward that the curse may in fact be true.

The day came when I had to leave the brewery and as I heard the inspiring words of my learned elder, piss off, quoted he, no more free beer.

So beer-less I wandered into the dark and lonely streets of the city, with only a stunt tash for company, I wondered what to do with my life (I had graduated with honors in wondering).

I took a dramatic pace, as it was something I had always fancied trying and decided that it was up to me to lift the curse of the Polish priest.

But how do you lift the curse of a pope?

Serious research began as usual with the internet, but for once pornography did not seem to hold the answers I was looking for. So I decided to go to the font of all knowledge, or as it's known locally the pub.

Luckily in the corner of the pub indulging in a game of five's and three's , was a wandering minstrel, who I thought could answer some of my questions.

(Part two as soon as I can be bothered)

Hidden Whippet - Crouching Ferret (Part1)

Discussion started by TyneTalk (IP Logged), 19/08/2010 21:36

TyneTalk
19/08/2010 21:36

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tunyc
20/08/2010 16:27

Quote:

Dave
but for once, pornography did not seem to hold the answers I was looking for

The horror! Hasn't failed me yet...

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davenufc
21/08/2010 09:56

In this case it did, who would have thought?

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lostmekeys
21/08/2010 23:53

a ripping yarn!
(thats a compliment, to those who havent seen what palin did after monty python...god i feel old saying that)

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Biffins Bridge
22/08/2010 05:07

Remember them well LMK.... and yes, I also feel old for it.

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tunyc
22/08/2010 16:24

It's alright, gramps-at least you're not confused/frightened by teh intartubez!

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